exploring the art of the re-gift

So, I am going to try to add a new tradition/activity to our Christmas marathon this year. My folks always come up a few days before Christmas (we have major graham cracker architectural building to do, y’ know) and when they first arrive we all get excited and can’t resist beginning the holiday gift-giving the moment they walk in the door. We do let mom unload her ice chest, but really, we all want to start showing off what we’ve made for each other.

I want to head this off at the pass….here’s my plan.

First we make drinks. Then we chit chat. Let mom rearrange my fridge. Let dad set up the infrastructure of the graham cracker amusement park. Check out the glue gun inventory (and hopefully declare that four will be plenty). Let Toby decide he will behave. And pour another glass of wine.

Then we are going to give the crap out of Christmas (doesn’t that sound like fun?). Steve, Kate, Alex, my mom and dad, and myself….all will be responsible for one White Elephant gift, and we will follow traditional white elephant rules. Pick numbers, and number one goes first…number two can take their gift or take their own.  And, on top of  the first annual exchange of crap from my home to yours (except that three of us live in my home, so I am not sure I thought this out), we each have to bring at least one non crap gift to regift to someone else. You don’t have to do it for everyone. You can’t buy it…it has to be something you already own that the other person might actually like. You MUST do one regift, but you can do as many as you like.

I figure this will help get us through noon on the 24th.

Everyone agreed to play. Steve did heave an audible sigh, but knew not to argue. He said, “Please put a size limit on it. Otherwise your dad is going to show up with some huge stupid ass piece of crap and tell me it’s yard art and I will be stuck with it, unless I can figure out how to get it back in the trunk of his car before he leaves.”

I told him he was being a spoiled sport. He reminded me of the giant wooden angel in our rafters, with a Christmas light halo. And I know he was thinking about the room my dad has dedicated to his train set, and his rather impressive collection of remote controlled airplanes (perhaps jealousy setting in?).  I told him Dad would more likely be parting with his wind up sushi toys, or something small and manageable.

Then I got a note from my mom saying, “We’re having fun with the regifts, but they are bigger than our regular gifts. I hope we can fit everything in the car.”

Holding my breath on this one.


About kim tackett

Northern CA marketing consultant, writer of very small stories, and drinker of very strong coffee.
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